“I was stressed because my dad has cancer and he’s older and at a higher risk.”

Maggie Kelnhofer is a senior majoring in psychology and minoring in counseling at UW-Milwaukee. She talked to Elizabeth Charney about pandemic stress, and fear for her father, who has cancer.

(Elizabeth Charney): When you found out for the first time that classes were going to be back in-person how did you feel?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): I was both excited and anxious to be back on campus. I felt like I was finally in school again because having classes online didn’t even feel real. Going back to campus made me feel like a real student again. But, I was anxious because I didn’t know how many people were going to be vaccinated, if people were going to be wearing masks, or just following the rules for this semester in general.

(Elizabeth Charney): Were you nervous for yourself or was it for another reason?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): I was stressed because my dad has cancer and he’s older and at a higher risk. So being back in-person and not knowing how people were going to treat this semester was a big stressor.

(Elizabeth Charney): Did that affect how often you saw your parents, especially your dad?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): Yeah, my dad is vaccinated, but throughout the entire pandemic I was afraid to see or even be around him because I was scared that I would give it to him. Not only am I on campus now, but I’m also in the service industry everyday. So not knowing what people on campus are going to be doing made it difficult to want to see him. I didn’t want to risk his safety.

(Elizabeth Charney): So going into your first week at campus how were you feeling?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): It felt so surreal and I was curious to see how things were going to be different when being back. I kept thinking “are people going to be wearing masks? Are there going to be any arguments that break out?”.  It’s so polarizing and political. I have kids in a couple of my classes who are either wearing their mask under their chin or not even wearing one at all. It makes me feel more anxious and a little angry.

(Elizabeth Charney): What else changed for you personally during the pandemic that made it hard for you when going back to in-person?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): I’m shy and would call myself an introvert, but I never had problems with social interactions. I noticed that my ability to make “small talk” with people that I don’t know has diminished. I feel significantly more awkward when I’m talking to someone because I lost that skill. Its even hard with people I hadn’t seen in over a year, who I really care about. During the pandemic you wanted to stay in contact with everyone you knew because you couldn’t run into them on campus, but it felt exhausting.

(Elizabeth Charney): Starting the pandemic you were a sophomore, now returning to campus you’re a senior. Does it feel weird to be graduating as soon as you are?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): I think that’s been one of the hardest things for me to grasp. In some ways I feel like I’m still a sophomore because time didn’t feel like it passed. It’s very overwhelming to be thinking that I will be graduating.

(Elizabeth Charney): Have any of your plans changed for after you graduate?

(Maggie Kelnhofer): I had originally planned on going to grad school right after college. Then, after the pandemic I decided that I wanted to take a gap year so I can slow down and just experience life. I just feel like a year of my life has been taken away from me in some aspects.

(Elizabeth Charney): What’s something you wished you would have known going into the pandemic as a college student? (Maggie Kelnhofer): I think it would have been nice for someone to tell me to take one day at a time and that everything was going to be okay. I think I put too much pressure on myself during the pandemic by worrying constantly